The Wagon

Have you ever fallen off the wagon so hard you’re not exactly sure how to get back on?

You sit there on the ground, dazed and confused, not quite sure what happened. You’re bruised, you’re shocked, but – most of all – you’re disappointed that you let it happen.

Yeah, that’s me right now.

Just three weeks ago, I celebrated the fact that I had squeezed into my bridesmaid’s dress for my brother-in-law’s wedding. I had blogged consistently the weeks [months] leading up to the goal. I held myself accountable. And, damn it, I made it happen. I achieved my goal, despite all of the obstacles leading up to it.

The second that zipper went down, the horse must have bucked or something, because I FLEW off that wagon and haven’t been able to spot it since.

Did I mention I had pasta and a heath bar for dinner last night? Yeah. Where the $#@! did that wagon go?

Despite my utter disgust with myself right now, I can’t see to find the motivation to fix it.

Fortunately, years of dieting has ingrained some good habits into me, regardless of the fact that my wagon is off on the Oregon Trail or something right now.

I pack lunch, which normally consists of a salad or a lean cuisine. I keep raw almonds and protein bars at work. Dinner, of course, is another story. One that I’m too exhausted/depressed to tell at the moment.

I’m in a funk. Can someone show me the way back to my happy place? I could use a trail guide right about now.

In the trough of my wave,

~ Tori


3 thoughts on “The Wagon

  1. Good work for planning your lunches! Sounds like you haven’t fallen off the wagon at all. Maybe really all you have had is a lapse. My suggestion, stop feeling guilty, this happens to the best of us and is completely normal. Slowly get back into routine and maybe incorporate the foods you enjoy into your diet this time, but just be portion conscious. May stop future lapse as you won’t be missing these foods.

  2. I think falling off the wagon in an overwhelming way is so relatable to so many of us! The only thing that really gets me back on track is some very honest introspection…often coupled being with so unhappy with myself that I must change (although I don’t think that’s a healthy strategy.) So I hope you can find your motivation and keep going 🙂

  3. I can relate to this all to well. I have done the same thing. I have stopped working out like I was, and my eating has pretty much gone to shit. But you know what? It happens. We just have to start making those small changes again and know that it is completely normal. You reached your goal, and you let yourself celebrate a little bit. The big thing is that you know you have fallen off the wagon and you are wanting to get back to where you were. So just put one step forward and get back up!! You can do it 🙂

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