I’m Alive!

For anyone that follows my blog with any consistency, you’ve probably noticed the sudden – and unannounced – silence.

First things first: I’m totally OK!

No melt downs, no binge/purge episodes, nothing.

I’m totally fine.

After weeks upon weeks of my Daily Accountability Reports (sharing with the world EVERY bite of food I ate and exercise I completed), I realized that I needed a few days off to give my brain a break.

I needed to take a few days of NOT tracking what I ate and letting my body tell me what it wanted again. Any time I catch myself becoming obsessive with something, I try to put the brakes on quickly: it’s very easy for me to slip back into my old behaviors. If I obsess too much about my food log or my gym attendance, I’ll start to let that cloying guilt sink in… you know, that weighted pain in the back of your mind that tells you each bite you take is BAD, BAD, BAD.

The moment I start to sense the voice returning, I do whatever I need to do to shut it down. FAST.

In this case, as I was writing my Thursday Night Accountability report, I could hear that voice again… it was mocking me as I typed. It was reading my food log over my shoulder, criticizing every snack. It laughed at my measly 45 minutes at the gym, and it made me feel guilty.

That’s when I realized I needed a short reprieve from the accountability reports.

Don’t worry – I’m still alive, positive, and kicking butts. 🙂 More posts to come!

T-Minus 10 days until my Dirty Thirty Birthday!

Bon appetit, my friends!

~ Tori

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