Costume

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Halloween Success… sort of.

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For Halloween this year, I decided to go outside of my normal costume safety realm (aka, face paint) and indulge in a sexy costume for my friend’s annual shindig.

I bought my costume with fear and hesitation, unsure if I could really go through with wearing glorified lingerie and calling myself a superhero.

I compromised with myself by purchasing a skirt and knee-high socks, hoping that the more secondary skin I could cover, the less nervous I would be about a flash of midriff, a healthy serving of cleavage, and an uncomfortable display of thigh.

For anyone that struggles with yo-yo dieting, you know that “goal outfits” are both inspiration and a taunting reminder from the back of your closet.

In the weeks leading up to the party, I stared at the little red corset and wondered how I would close it around my ever-fluctuating waistline. That little ruffle skirt mocked me from the moth-ball ridden trenches, telling me it would flutter in all the wrong places.

Despite several weeks of candy-munching between salads, I managed to hold a steady 133 on party day and asked my husband to help me suit up and take my rightful place as Batman’s sidekick.

I’m glad I did.

Even if I wasn’t 100% happy with the tone of my arms, the softness of my tummy, or the jiggle of my upper thighs, I knew that years of work led up to me wearing that costume.

I felt good.

I felt confident.

I felt like a superhero (sidekick).

So, even if my body still isn’t exactly where I want it to be, I call that a success. I earned that cape, buddy.

Bon appetit, my friends, and keep working toward your goals!

– Tori

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Halloween: Joy and Challenge

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Like many of you, Halloween is one of my favorite times of the year. It’s equally a child’s holiday as it is an adult’s, with only a small age range that chooses not to participate. I remember at 13 saying I was “too old to dress up.”

Man, was I missing out on a lot of fun.

I’d like to go back and slap 13-year-old-self in the face! You get to eat copious amounts of candy without judgement, attend parties, and dress up like anything you want! Come on, young-Tori, don’t be an idiot.

I’m pretty sure the costume stores have double the adult options as they do kiddie choices, and they’re not all “sexy cops” and “sexy nurses,” either. This year, since I’m attending multiple parties, I stocked up on props (fake blood, fake battle wounds, etc) and splurged on a secret costume that I’m going to unveil at a party next weekend.

Last night, I attended an OUTBREAK Survivor Party, so the majority of our costumes were zombie themed. I had fun with the makeup and shirt-decoration last night:

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So, what’s the downside to all of this partying and costume menagerie?

THE FOOD.

At the beginning of last week, I had gotten down to my all-time low of 130.6. I’ve never seen the scale dip that close to the blessed 120s and I was ecstatic.  As usual, I took a picture because I could hardly believe it:

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As you can imagine, though, I’m no where near that number today.

After almost two weeks of snacking on candy at work and then attending a few parties consisting of fried foods, chips, and lots of frothy beverages, my weight this morning is back up to 134.

SIGH.

It’s just a never-ending cycle. With holidays always a part of life – and the desire to splurge when around friends – it makes it really hard to come to an equilibrium with my body. I’m regimented for weeks, then destroy my efforts in a few days of all-out eating.  I’m not going to cut my friends out of my life. I’m not going to convert to Jehovah’s Witness to avoid the celebration of holidays. So what’s a yo-yo to do?

Well, I can tell you what this yo-yo is going to do today:

  • Have a cup of coffee to shake off the remaining effects of yesterday’s party.
  • Search for my make-up remover, as the good ol’ soap and water used on my face doesn’t seem to have gotten off all of the blood. I look rabid at the moment.
  • Hit the gym.
  • Eat as healthy as I can while recognizing that it’s the month of candy and I’m not going to escape it.
  • Enjoy a beautiful Florida day.

Halloween is both my joy and my challenge and I’ve decided I’m just going to roll with it today and not let a slight increase on the scale bring me down.

Bon appetit, my friends!

~ Tori

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