Author: Victoria Elizabeth

Victoria Elizabeth http://www.victoriaelizabethann.com Bubbly and enthusiastic, I am a lover of all things pink. My writing style is as eclectic as my personal library, so you'll see everything from dark poetry to light-hearted short stories posted in my portfolio.

Laughing Giraffe Organics

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Since I’m in approaching-birthday-diet-blitz mode right now, I’ve been seeking out healthy, Paleo snacks that I can grab whenever the sweets craving hits. I’m normally pretty good about making them, as I’m constantly posting recipes on here, but sometimes I just need something quick, tasty, and convenient.

Of all places, I happened to stumble upon this brand of Paleo snacks – Laughing Giraffe Organics – while in Marshalls.

A clothing store? Beats me.

I have a habit of roaming the aisles aimlessly when I go to Marshalls and I often find myself lingering in the food aisle, as they have unique spices, interesting sauces, and lots of [surprisingly] healthy snacks. Normally I end up picking up organic agave syrup, Indian spices, and a few bags of sweet potato chips, but this time I came across a bag of Laughing Giraffe Organic “snackaroons” and decided to give them a shot.

LaughingGiraffe

Holy crap.

They are AMAZING.

They are moist, chewy, and satisfying, but not too sweet. They pack a ton of fiber and are vegan, organic, gluten-free, and flour-free. To be honest, I was skeptical when I picked them up, as they sounded too good to be true. Cardboard cookies, anyone?

Boy, was I wrong. They are absolutely delicious and just the right texture – chewy, firm, and almost like an oatmeal cookie with hidden chunks of macadamia nuts and cacao nubs.

They pack a decent amount of calories – about 160 for 1 and a 1/2 snackaroons [who only eats a half of a snackaroon, in the first place?] – but they were incredibly satisfying. While I *wanted* to have more than one, I found that a single snackaroon was satisfying and I could walk away from the bag.

These are a bit costly, ranging between $7-12 a bag in most stores, but definitely a good go-to when you’re in a crunch for a healthy snack and don’t have time to prepare something for yourself. They certainly taste better than any of the Paleo treats I’ve made, but that’s likely because I’m not the best baker.

Whether you’re on a Paleo diet, gluten-free diet, or just trying to avoid processed foods as a whole, I would definitely suggest checking these out next time you’re at Whole Foods. Or Marshalls, in my case. 🙂

Bon appetit, my friends!

~ Tori

One Month

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Crap.

It’s June 11th.

How is it already June?

Hell, how is it already summer to begin with? I swear, yesterday I was still cleaning tinsel and pine needles from my carpets and now suddenly this blasphemous wall calendar is telling me it’s mid-June. What gives? I deserve at least another six weeks of May before we move into this horrible, no-good, very bad month.

Why am I panicking?

It’s one month away from my birthday today.

For most people, this is an exciting thing. Good things are on the way, right?

Presents! Cake! Friends! Celebration! Presents! Time off! Presents!

For me, the weeks leading up to my birthday tend to be stressful. For one, I’m not handling the whole aging-thing well. I know my face isn’t collapsing into wrinkles yet and I’m not standing in line for Botox, but I can definitely see the years moving faster and the toll it’s having on my body, my mind, and my heart – and it terrifies me.

 

keep-calm-it-s-almost-your-birthday-3

 

I have a list of goals a mile long and the time seems to be sneaking away faster and faster.

One of the goals I have [every year] is to hit my goal body weight. Amazingly, I was on track for more than the first six months of this year [birth year, not new year], but I lost my mojo right around the holidays and have yet to get back into motion.

More than ever, I’ve been yo-yo’ing up and down since December 2012 and haven’t been able to get back into a diet or workout regimen that I can stick to for more than a few weeks.

Well, now we’re officially one month away from my birthday and I’m sitting more than 12 pounds over my goal weight, whereas I was just 4 pounds away from it back in December.

To say that I’m mad at myself is a bit of an understatement.

I’m disappointed. I’m embarrassed. For such a driven person, why do I let food and my own laziness beat me so often?

Fortunately, I’m not a morose person by nature, so instead of wallowing in depression today, I’ve merely recommitted myself to my goals. While I don’t think I can get 12 pounds off in 30 days [not in a healthy way, at least], I do think I can dent that number pretty substantially if I set my mind to it.

So… here goes. [Boy, deja-vu with that statement, right?]

Today’s weight: 142.2

Ideal Body Weight: 130 or less

Let’s do this.

Bon Appetit, my friends!

~ Tori

Paleo Pasta

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Last night, after a two hour cardio session at the gym, I was craving COMFORT food. Fattening, carb-rich, and delicious – I felt I deserved it.

Of course, it takes almost two hours to burn off 1,200 calories but about 5 minutes to eat it, so I opted to still prepare a healthy dinner so as not to negate my efforts.

Exhausted as I was, I threw together a fast, healthy, Paleo-friendly dish in about 10 minutes and it turned out to be a winner. Basically, I modified your “typical” Italian dinner – mounds of pasta with rich, creamy sauce and hunks of sausage – into a lighter, leaner version.

The Meat Sauce:

  • 1/2 cup red onions, diced
  • 1 tbsp extra virgin olive oil
  • 1 cup button mushrooms, washed and chopped
  • 5 Jennie-O Sweet Italian Sausages, slice about an inch thick
  • 1/2 cup dry red wine
  • 1/2 cup water
  • 1 jar of Organic Basil Marinara
  • 4 tbsp dried onion flakes
  • 2 tbsp dried basil
  • 2 tbsp garlic powder

In a large sauce pan, start by sauteing the onions and mushrooms until tender, or about 5 mins at medium heat. At this point, add the slices sausages and the dried seasonings increase the heat slightly, so as to sear it evenly. Once the sausages are cooked through [really, just 2-3 mins], add the red wine, the jar of sauce, and the water, as well as the onion flakes. Simmer for about 8 mins, or until your whole kitchen smells like a pizzeria.

The Noodles:

Here’s where you have options. Personally, I am OBSESSED with Shirataki noodles, such as Miracle Noodles or NoOodle, but you’re also welcome to use thinly sliced zucchini or even spaghetti squash [steamed, for both] as your base. In the case of the Shirataki noodles, just drain the noodles well in a colander, then dry-saute them in a wok or large pot in order to cook off the excess water. I drizzle them with a tiny bit of olive oil to keep them from sticking.

Putting it Together:

Once both the noodles and the sauce are finished, I prefer to toss it all together for even coating of the sauce and then sprinkle with just a DASH of Parmesan cheese. Depending on if you’re a hardcore Caveman, you may not have cheese. I try to avoid dairy, but permit myself the occasional sprinkle of Parmesan on my dishes, because it just adds so much flavor for very little caloric punch.

And there you have it! Paleo pasta that doesn’t negate your workout! Even non-Paleo dieters will approve, as the sauce is surprisingly flavorful and the sausage adds a distinct richness, despite the turkey-base. Yum yum!

 

Bon Appetit, my friends!

~Tori

 

Throw Back Thursday

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I seem to be one of the few people left in [social-media aware] society that doesn’t practice in the art of posting about Throw Back Thursdays.

So, what exactly is “Throw Back Thursday?” A toast to the past? A reflection on who/what we were in years gone by? Or is this just something Radio Jockeys use as an excuse when they’re tired of playing the same 40 songs over and over and want to mix it up a bit?

Well, since I don’t want to miss the boat on the tradition, here’s a little throw-back for you –

This is me - at age 16. Yeah. I was probably right around 195-200 lbs at this point in time.

This is me – at age 16. Yeah. I was probably right around 195-200 lbs at this point in time.

Yup. Just a little over one decade ago, this was my every day. This is right around the time in my life where I was a devout Mountain Dew enthusiast and would come home and prepare my “pre-dinner” – AKA, a family-sized portion of pasta salad or mashed potatoes that I’d eat before my family got home to have a real dinner.

A lot of people ask me why I keep some of these pictures around. This photo is actually in a drawer in my kitchen, which is where I’ve kept it in the last three homes I’ve lived in. I do it as a reminder of the person I once was: unhealthy, self-deprecating, and a little lonely.

While that may seem a bit morose on my part, it reminds me that every day I wake up, I get to make a decision. Well, several decisions actually:

Will I be happy or will I be sad?

Will I nourish my body or will I punish it?

Will I seek out the positive or dwell in the negative?

There’s something about looking at your past that makes the decisions of your future seem significantly easier.

So, Happy Throwback Thursday everyone. It’s time to make the most of the present and plan for the future.

Bon Appetit,

~ Tori

 

Spicy and Savory Brussels Sprouts – Paleo Recipe!

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Last year, my husband and I vacationed with some friends at a hotel down in Miami. I cannot remember the name of the restaurant, but the hotel featured a steakhouse that served the most delicious, most decadent side dish I’d ever had: Roasted Mustard Brussels Sprouts.

I know, I know. How can I use “delicious” and “Brussels Sprouts” in the same sentence? I’m one of those weird people that has ALWAYS loved them, but even my husband, an avid veggie hater, couldn’t stop enjoying these suckers. We personally ate two orders of them ourselves and shared a third order as an appetizer with the table.

I’ve tried to mimic the recipe and never gotten it perfect… until tonight. And, amazingly, I made my version in the lightest way possible AND kept it Paleo-friendly.

Here’s the recipe I concocted this evening:

INGREDIENTS:

  • One pound Brussels Sprouts, raw.
  • 1/4 cup garlic powder
  • 1/4 cup onion flakes
  • 1/2 horseradish mustard
  • 1/2 cup unsweetened almond milk
  • 1/4 cup Daiya “mozzarella” cheese
  • 1 tsp yellow curry powder

 

PREPARATION:

  • Boil the Brussels Sprouts in salted water [salt to your preference] with 1/2 of the garlic powder mixed into the water. I boiled mine for about 15 mins, until the Brussels Sprouts were bright green and still a little firm.
  • Drain the sprouts and then put them in an oven-safe baking dish.
  • In a small bowl, mix the almond milk, cheese, mustard, onion flakes, garlic powder, and remaining garlic powder into a thick sauce. Pour over the Brussels Sprouts, stir to coat, and pop into the oven on BROIL [500 degrees] until you see them getting nice and browned, approx 5-7 minutes.
  • Remove from oven and allow to cool for a moment or two, then stir to redistribute sauce and serve.

 

Seriously, even veggie-haters will enjoy this dish – it’s surprisingly low in calories and BIG on taste! The original we had at the restaurant in Eden Roc was made with lots of butter and probably other loaded ingredients, but this version came amazingly close to the same flavor for far less damage.

Enjoy and feel free to give feedback on any substitutions you try out!

Bon Appetit,

~ Tori

 

Simple Paleo Protein Shake

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In an effort to get back into a healthy regimen, I’ve been forcing myself to eat breakfast every morning. I’m normally a cup-of-coffee and go kind of lady, but I realize the importance of getting some protein and fiber in before running out of the house. Breakfast is crucial to jump-starting your metabolism in the morning, so my habit of skipping breakfast over the last few weeks is likely the main contributor to my recent weight gain [up 3 lbs!] and voracious hunger in the evenings.

Since I’m all for simplicity, I’ve been making the following protein shake for breakfast every morning:

  • 1 cup Blue Diamond, unsweetened almond milk – 30 calories
  • 1/2 cup organic frozen blueberries – approx 25 calories
  • 1 level scoop of Optimum Nutrition 100% Egg White Protein Powder – 120 calories
  • 1 tbsp cinnamon – 0 calories
  • 1/2 tbsp organic vanilla extract – 0 calories
  • 2 tbsp raw, organic cocoa powder – approx 25 calories
  • 1 heaping cup of ice [if preferred]

Blend this all together for about 30 seconds [total prep time is less than 2 mins] and enjoy! I’ve had this exact recipe for breakfast the last three days in a row and I’ve REALLY enjoyed it. I drink it around 8am and don’t get hungry until after 12pm. Yesterday, I didn’t eat lunch until 1:30pm, as I felt totally full all morning. Normally I find myself grazing for snacks by 11am, so that’s a pretty huge testament to the filling power of this shake.

Of course, you’re welcome to make substitutions to this to suit your tastes. One good substitution is to remove the berries and add two heaving tablespoons of instant coffee and a handful of Enjoy Life non-dairy, non-soy chocolate chips! I swear, when I do this, the finished product tastes just like the Jamocha Shake from Arby’s. Yum!

Bon appetit, my friends!

~ Tori

The Wagon

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Have you ever fallen off the wagon so hard you’re not exactly sure how to get back on?

You sit there on the ground, dazed and confused, not quite sure what happened. You’re bruised, you’re shocked, but – most of all – you’re disappointed that you let it happen.

Yeah, that’s me right now.

Just three weeks ago, I celebrated the fact that I had squeezed into my bridesmaid’s dress for my brother-in-law’s wedding. I had blogged consistently the weeks [months] leading up to the goal. I held myself accountable. And, damn it, I made it happen. I achieved my goal, despite all of the obstacles leading up to it.

The second that zipper went down, the horse must have bucked or something, because I FLEW off that wagon and haven’t been able to spot it since.

Did I mention I had pasta and a heath bar for dinner last night? Yeah. Where the $#@! did that wagon go?

Despite my utter disgust with myself right now, I can’t see to find the motivation to fix it.

Fortunately, years of dieting has ingrained some good habits into me, regardless of the fact that my wagon is off on the Oregon Trail or something right now.

I pack lunch, which normally consists of a salad or a lean cuisine. I keep raw almonds and protein bars at work. Dinner, of course, is another story. One that I’m too exhausted/depressed to tell at the moment.

I’m in a funk. Can someone show me the way back to my happy place? I could use a trail guide right about now.

In the trough of my wave,

~ Tori

It fit!

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By some miracle of God [and a few last minute workouts], the bridesmaid’s dress FIT on Sunday night! YES!

I'm only taking shallow gasps of air, but it zipped!

I’m only taking shallow gasps of air, but it zipped!

When I purchased it, I was a solid 1 & 1/2 inches away from being able to zip it. One week before the wedding, it was about 1/2 an inch. The night before – AKA, the last chance I had to buy an alternate – it zipped all the way up!

I definitely learned my lesson about procrastinating, however, as the stress I was feeling over fitting into the dress nearly negated the elation I felt when it zipped. Crash diets and intense workouts are not good on my body or my emotional well-being, so I will make sure I either buy a dress that FITS off of the rack or plan my exercise/diet regimen more realistically for an event.

Regardless, the dress fit, the wedding was SPECTACULAR, and I now have a new sister who will soon be recruited for workouts. Life is pretty good. I have no complaints. I need to stress less, love more, and STOP WATCHING THE SCALE.

I’m working on it. One day at a time.

Bon appetit, my friends!

~ Tori