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Life Lessons

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I just wanted to take a quick moment to share some life lessons I’ve picked up in the last 24 hours.

Don’t worry, I’ll be quick.

  1. It’s a bad idea to sign up for GymPact the evening before you have an out-patient surgery. Out-patient surgeries typically don’t allow you to do strenuous workouts for a few days after the procedure to ensure you don’t exacerbate the injury.

  2. It’s an even WORSE idea to ignore the post-op care and attempt to go for a run 24 hours after your procedure. Popped stitches = owwies. But I’m not losing my $5, damn it!

  3. If you’re hungry but don’t know what to eat, drink a Fox Barrel Blackberry Pear Cider. Fucking delicious. 130 calories. And Paleo!

  4. Ciders [or the alcohol inside them] numb your stomach and you no longer want to eat every piece of junk food in your house.

  5. Sweat REALLY burns when it gets into your stitches.

  6. Seriously. Sweat + open wounds = bad idea.

That being said, I skipped my workout on Monday but went today, primarily because I didn’t want to lose money on GymPact and I needed to hit 5 workouts by Sunday at midnight. With Monday a wash, I couldn’t skip a second day.

What did I tell you? I’m motivated when I have a goal – especially a financial one – on the line!

Bon appetit, my friends!

~ Tori

Independence Day

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It’s been over 200 years since America declared its independence from their distant British ruler. Over two centuries since America and its colonies established itself as a force to be reckoned with on a global scale. For 237 years, the United States has stood for freedom, for acceptance, and for refuge for those suffering.

Suffering from persecution, prejudice, or the restriction of their basic human rights? You’ve found sanctuary here.

It seems fitting, then, that I found myself reflecting on my personal struggles with weight and body image during the festivities of the 4th of July celebration.

For years, I’ve been a slave to the scale.

You can't see it, but imagine a ball and chain locking me to this damn thing.

You can’t see it, but imagine a ball and chain locking me to this damn thing.

I’ve allowed it to dictate my mood, control even my most basic decisions, and play the role of judge and jury over the value of my life.

I’ve talked about it here extensively in the past, but the scale in my bathroom is both one of my most prized possessions – as well as one of the most malignant items in my house.

A good weigh-in means a day of happiness, of celebration, of pride.

A bad weigh-in means a day of guilt, of self-inflicted punishment, of shame.

You know, I’m getting really tired of the oppressive dictatorship of my scale.

While I can’t directly compare it to the British control over the American colonies, I can relate to the feeling that it’s not quite FAIR that this scale – which is not involved in my exercise, my diet, or any other element of my health – is able to have so much control over me. Sort of feels like taxation without representation, you know?

That’s just not right.

So, with that thought in mind, and a healthy dose of American pride coursing through my veins thanks to the fireworks yesterday, I’ve decided to declare my independence from the scale.

While I’m not sure I have the strength or fortitude of our founding fathers to make it a PERMANENT division in our relationship, I do plan to secede from the scale for as long as possible. A few days. A week. Maybe I can make it until the end of July, who knows.

Regardless, I’m declaring today – July 5th, 2013 – my personal Independence Day from the scale. Much like the British, I anticipate a bit of retaliation from the little metal and glass piece of evil… but I’ll fight that battle when I have to. In the meantime, I’m going to savor my liberty for as long as possible.

Bon appetit, my friends, and happy Independence Day [from the scale] to all!

~ Tori

Too much of a good thing?

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Everyone has a favorite.

A favorite color. A favorite food. Favorite pair of jeans. Shoes.

Place. Person. Pet.

[Shhhhhhh. Don’t tell anyone, but I sort of like my boy Chihuahua a bit more than my girl. Proof is that he has his own Facebook page and she doesn’t. Whoops!]

Everyone is guilty of having favorites in almost every aspect of their life, including their fitness regime.

I happen to have a favorite type of cardio exercise: the elliptical machine.

If you've followed this blog for a while, you probably realize that's not ME in the photo.

If you’ve followed this blog for a while, you probably realize that’s not ME in the photo.

Image source: http://www.ellipticals.us/

I don’t know what it is about this machine in particular, but I can literally spend 90+ minutes on it and feel great. The TV distracts me, I’m often rocking out to some killer tunes, and in some cases, I’m reading a book for the duration of the workout.

Unfortunately, you can have too much of a good thing.

I’m extremely guilty of not diversifying my workout. I have a tendency, especially when I’m tired or not motivated, to do the exact same exercise [60-90 minutes on the elliptical] every time I go to the gym.

For the past three weeks, other than one super motivated day in which I did a strength circuit, I’ve ONLY done the elliptical machine as my exercise.

Yeahhhhh.

The same machine. Always for 60-90 minutes. Every week, 4-5x per week.

As you can probably guess… it’s not helping my weight loss. In fact, as of this morning, I’m up a pound from my starting weight on June 11th.

It’s frustrating, because, despite the repetitious-aspect, I’m putting in effort. I leave the gym pouring sweat. I feel an ache in my legs the next day, which is normally a good indicator that I’ve given those muscles a pretty strenuous workout.

Why isn’t that enough?

I was reading a few fitness articles online and I discovered there are a couple of major CONS to doing the same workout over and over.

  • For one, you’re more prone to injury! As this article by Body4Life states, doing the same workout over and over creates a “repetitive-task” response, which can lead to an increased chance of injury.
  • The workout becomes less effective. As you continue to do the same workout over and over, your muscles learn the motion and it requires less energy/effort to mimic the action. Practice makes perfect – but, in this case, it means the workout provides less overall caloric burn because it’s not a challenge to your muscles anymore.
  • You won’t see the same results. If you continue doing the same exercise over and over but expect different results [aka, new definition or muscle development], you’re going to be sorely disappointed. [get it? sorely disappointed?! I’m such a pun-artist!]

So, with all of that being said, I guess I’ve fallen into the cardio-rut and it’s time to overhaul my workout a bit.

I hate to say this, Mr. Elliptical-by-the-Door, it’s time to take a break. I need to see other machines.

facebook-break-up

That treadmill is looking mighty sexy. And I’m pretty sure Mr. Stairclimber has been checking me out all night. Don’t get me started on the rowing machine… he’s been dying to bend me over since he laid eyes on me.

Don’t be upset. We can stay friends. I’ll still visit from time-to-time. I’m just not ready for a committed relationship at this point, you know?

I’m glad you understand. I love you and I’ll never forget the joy – and the sore buttocks – you’ve brought me.

Bon appetit, my friends —

~ Tori

 

One Month

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Crap.

It’s June 11th.

How is it already June?

Hell, how is it already summer to begin with? I swear, yesterday I was still cleaning tinsel and pine needles from my carpets and now suddenly this blasphemous wall calendar is telling me it’s mid-June. What gives? I deserve at least another six weeks of May before we move into this horrible, no-good, very bad month.

Why am I panicking?

It’s one month away from my birthday today.

For most people, this is an exciting thing. Good things are on the way, right?

Presents! Cake! Friends! Celebration! Presents! Time off! Presents!

For me, the weeks leading up to my birthday tend to be stressful. For one, I’m not handling the whole aging-thing well. I know my face isn’t collapsing into wrinkles yet and I’m not standing in line for Botox, but I can definitely see the years moving faster and the toll it’s having on my body, my mind, and my heart – and it terrifies me.

 

keep-calm-it-s-almost-your-birthday-3

 

I have a list of goals a mile long and the time seems to be sneaking away faster and faster.

One of the goals I have [every year] is to hit my goal body weight. Amazingly, I was on track for more than the first six months of this year [birth year, not new year], but I lost my mojo right around the holidays and have yet to get back into motion.

More than ever, I’ve been yo-yo’ing up and down since December 2012 and haven’t been able to get back into a diet or workout regimen that I can stick to for more than a few weeks.

Well, now we’re officially one month away from my birthday and I’m sitting more than 12 pounds over my goal weight, whereas I was just 4 pounds away from it back in December.

To say that I’m mad at myself is a bit of an understatement.

I’m disappointed. I’m embarrassed. For such a driven person, why do I let food and my own laziness beat me so often?

Fortunately, I’m not a morose person by nature, so instead of wallowing in depression today, I’ve merely recommitted myself to my goals. While I don’t think I can get 12 pounds off in 30 days [not in a healthy way, at least], I do think I can dent that number pretty substantially if I set my mind to it.

So… here goes. [Boy, deja-vu with that statement, right?]

Today’s weight: 142.2

Ideal Body Weight: 130 or less

Let’s do this.

Bon Appetit, my friends!

~ Tori

Paleo Pasta

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Last night, after a two hour cardio session at the gym, I was craving COMFORT food. Fattening, carb-rich, and delicious – I felt I deserved it.

Of course, it takes almost two hours to burn off 1,200 calories but about 5 minutes to eat it, so I opted to still prepare a healthy dinner so as not to negate my efforts.

Exhausted as I was, I threw together a fast, healthy, Paleo-friendly dish in about 10 minutes and it turned out to be a winner. Basically, I modified your “typical” Italian dinner – mounds of pasta with rich, creamy sauce and hunks of sausage – into a lighter, leaner version.

The Meat Sauce:

  • 1/2 cup red onions, diced
  • 1 tbsp extra virgin olive oil
  • 1 cup button mushrooms, washed and chopped
  • 5 Jennie-O Sweet Italian Sausages, slice about an inch thick
  • 1/2 cup dry red wine
  • 1/2 cup water
  • 1 jar of Organic Basil Marinara
  • 4 tbsp dried onion flakes
  • 2 tbsp dried basil
  • 2 tbsp garlic powder

In a large sauce pan, start by sauteing the onions and mushrooms until tender, or about 5 mins at medium heat. At this point, add the slices sausages and the dried seasonings increase the heat slightly, so as to sear it evenly. Once the sausages are cooked through [really, just 2-3 mins], add the red wine, the jar of sauce, and the water, as well as the onion flakes. Simmer for about 8 mins, or until your whole kitchen smells like a pizzeria.

The Noodles:

Here’s where you have options. Personally, I am OBSESSED with Shirataki noodles, such as Miracle Noodles or NoOodle, but you’re also welcome to use thinly sliced zucchini or even spaghetti squash [steamed, for both] as your base. In the case of the Shirataki noodles, just drain the noodles well in a colander, then dry-saute them in a wok or large pot in order to cook off the excess water. I drizzle them with a tiny bit of olive oil to keep them from sticking.

Putting it Together:

Once both the noodles and the sauce are finished, I prefer to toss it all together for even coating of the sauce and then sprinkle with just a DASH of Parmesan cheese. Depending on if you’re a hardcore Caveman, you may not have cheese. I try to avoid dairy, but permit myself the occasional sprinkle of Parmesan on my dishes, because it just adds so much flavor for very little caloric punch.

And there you have it! Paleo pasta that doesn’t negate your workout! Even non-Paleo dieters will approve, as the sauce is surprisingly flavorful and the sausage adds a distinct richness, despite the turkey-base. Yum yum!

 

Bon Appetit, my friends!

~Tori

 

Throw Back Thursday

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I seem to be one of the few people left in [social-media aware] society that doesn’t practice in the art of posting about Throw Back Thursdays.

So, what exactly is “Throw Back Thursday?” A toast to the past? A reflection on who/what we were in years gone by? Or is this just something Radio Jockeys use as an excuse when they’re tired of playing the same 40 songs over and over and want to mix it up a bit?

Well, since I don’t want to miss the boat on the tradition, here’s a little throw-back for you –

This is me - at age 16. Yeah. I was probably right around 195-200 lbs at this point in time.

This is me – at age 16. Yeah. I was probably right around 195-200 lbs at this point in time.

Yup. Just a little over one decade ago, this was my every day. This is right around the time in my life where I was a devout Mountain Dew enthusiast and would come home and prepare my “pre-dinner” – AKA, a family-sized portion of pasta salad or mashed potatoes that I’d eat before my family got home to have a real dinner.

A lot of people ask me why I keep some of these pictures around. This photo is actually in a drawer in my kitchen, which is where I’ve kept it in the last three homes I’ve lived in. I do it as a reminder of the person I once was: unhealthy, self-deprecating, and a little lonely.

While that may seem a bit morose on my part, it reminds me that every day I wake up, I get to make a decision. Well, several decisions actually:

Will I be happy or will I be sad?

Will I nourish my body or will I punish it?

Will I seek out the positive or dwell in the negative?

There’s something about looking at your past that makes the decisions of your future seem significantly easier.

So, Happy Throwback Thursday everyone. It’s time to make the most of the present and plan for the future.

Bon Appetit,

~ Tori

 

Spicy and Savory Brussels Sprouts – Paleo Recipe!

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Last year, my husband and I vacationed with some friends at a hotel down in Miami. I cannot remember the name of the restaurant, but the hotel featured a steakhouse that served the most delicious, most decadent side dish I’d ever had: Roasted Mustard Brussels Sprouts.

I know, I know. How can I use “delicious” and “Brussels Sprouts” in the same sentence? I’m one of those weird people that has ALWAYS loved them, but even my husband, an avid veggie hater, couldn’t stop enjoying these suckers. We personally ate two orders of them ourselves and shared a third order as an appetizer with the table.

I’ve tried to mimic the recipe and never gotten it perfect… until tonight. And, amazingly, I made my version in the lightest way possible AND kept it Paleo-friendly.

Here’s the recipe I concocted this evening:

INGREDIENTS:

  • One pound Brussels Sprouts, raw.
  • 1/4 cup garlic powder
  • 1/4 cup onion flakes
  • 1/2 horseradish mustard
  • 1/2 cup unsweetened almond milk
  • 1/4 cup Daiya “mozzarella” cheese
  • 1 tsp yellow curry powder

 

PREPARATION:

  • Boil the Brussels Sprouts in salted water [salt to your preference] with 1/2 of the garlic powder mixed into the water. I boiled mine for about 15 mins, until the Brussels Sprouts were bright green and still a little firm.
  • Drain the sprouts and then put them in an oven-safe baking dish.
  • In a small bowl, mix the almond milk, cheese, mustard, onion flakes, garlic powder, and remaining garlic powder into a thick sauce. Pour over the Brussels Sprouts, stir to coat, and pop into the oven on BROIL [500 degrees] until you see them getting nice and browned, approx 5-7 minutes.
  • Remove from oven and allow to cool for a moment or two, then stir to redistribute sauce and serve.

 

Seriously, even veggie-haters will enjoy this dish – it’s surprisingly low in calories and BIG on taste! The original we had at the restaurant in Eden Roc was made with lots of butter and probably other loaded ingredients, but this version came amazingly close to the same flavor for far less damage.

Enjoy and feel free to give feedback on any substitutions you try out!

Bon Appetit,

~ Tori

 

Simple Paleo Protein Shake

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In an effort to get back into a healthy regimen, I’ve been forcing myself to eat breakfast every morning. I’m normally a cup-of-coffee and go kind of lady, but I realize the importance of getting some protein and fiber in before running out of the house. Breakfast is crucial to jump-starting your metabolism in the morning, so my habit of skipping breakfast over the last few weeks is likely the main contributor to my recent weight gain [up 3 lbs!] and voracious hunger in the evenings.

Since I’m all for simplicity, I’ve been making the following protein shake for breakfast every morning:

  • 1 cup Blue Diamond, unsweetened almond milk – 30 calories
  • 1/2 cup organic frozen blueberries – approx 25 calories
  • 1 level scoop of Optimum Nutrition 100% Egg White Protein Powder – 120 calories
  • 1 tbsp cinnamon – 0 calories
  • 1/2 tbsp organic vanilla extract – 0 calories
  • 2 tbsp raw, organic cocoa powder – approx 25 calories
  • 1 heaping cup of ice [if preferred]

Blend this all together for about 30 seconds [total prep time is less than 2 mins] and enjoy! I’ve had this exact recipe for breakfast the last three days in a row and I’ve REALLY enjoyed it. I drink it around 8am and don’t get hungry until after 12pm. Yesterday, I didn’t eat lunch until 1:30pm, as I felt totally full all morning. Normally I find myself grazing for snacks by 11am, so that’s a pretty huge testament to the filling power of this shake.

Of course, you’re welcome to make substitutions to this to suit your tastes. One good substitution is to remove the berries and add two heaving tablespoons of instant coffee and a handful of Enjoy Life non-dairy, non-soy chocolate chips! I swear, when I do this, the finished product tastes just like the Jamocha Shake from Arby’s. Yum!

Bon appetit, my friends!

~ Tori