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Breakfast of Champions!

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Even though this looks like a giant bowl of ice cream, it’s actually a protein-packed bowl of breakfast deliciousness!

The simple ingredients:

  • 2 cups Chobani nonfat Greek yogurt – (200 cals, 36g protein, 14g carbs!)
  • 1/2 tsp of chia seeds
  • 1/2 cup papaya
  • 1/2 cup pineapple
  • 1/2 cup watermelon
  • 1/2 cup blackberries

Toss together in a bowl (I’m Sunday-morning lazy and tossed it into a disposable one) and dig in!

The sweetness of the fruit counters the tartness of plain yogurt, so save the temptation to stir any sugar or honey into the yogurt – it’s good on its own!

Bon appetit, my friends!

~Tori

Cheater, Cheater, Pumpkin Eater!

Remember that old adage from elementary school?

“Cheater, cheater, pumpkin eater!”

Never has it been more true for this yo-yo. Not only have I been cheating on my Paleo diet, I’ve been cheating with… you guessed it… PUMPKIN!

The Pumpkin Spice Latte is back at Starbucks and it happens to be my greatest weakness:

This is the same sign that will adorn the gates of Heaven. Or Hell. Probably both, except it's calorie-free at the Northern gates.

This is the same sign that will adorn the gates of Heaven. Or Hell. Probably both, except it’s calorie-free at the Northern locale.

I normally try to avoid both pure sugar and dairy, yet I find it nearly impossible to this time of the year.  Late August through the holidays = kryptonite to us pumpkin-lovers!

Why, oh why, did a cruel Barista feel the need to introduce me to this decadent temptation two years ago?

I’ve been an addict ever since.

If you can resist the lure of these sirens, you're a f*cking saint. Image Source: http://media.northjersey.com/images/1028F_starbuckspumpkin40p.jpg

If you can resist the lure of these sirens, you’re a f*cking saint.
Image Source: http://media.northjersey.com/images/1028F_starbuckspumpkin40p.jpg

And, since I’m cheating with these dairy killers (even ordering the nonfat version with no whipped cream, it’s still over 260 calories for a grande – and I never get less than a venti!), I’m allowing myself to have my other dairy favorite:

SOOOOOO GOOOOOOD!!!

SOOOOOO GOOOOOOD!!!

Chobani Nonfat Plain Yogurts!

At least these protein-packed dairy-bombs feature far less sugar (just 7g!) and deliver a whopping 18g of protein – so it’s probably one of the healthiest of all cheats. Of course, dairy is normally eliminated from the Paleo diet due to the mucus-development that ensues and the gastrointestinal disdain your stomach feels for you after it’s passed through… but damn, it’s so good.

So, yeah, between PSLs and Chobani dream-cups (my new nickname for ’em), I’ve been cheating my way right to the scale the last 48 hours. Although, I don’t plan to weigh myself this week until Friday (I’m really trying to get down to 1-2x per week versus daily), so I won’t actually know what damage I may be causing to my Paleo weight loss success for a few more days.

On that note, I can really go for a latte before my workout tonight!

Bon appetit, my friends!

~Tori

Labor Day Breakfast!

With a fridge full of Farmer’s Market goodies, I knew breakfast was going to be delicious today. I just had no idea it was going to be FOODGASMIC.

I started off by sautéing a fresh, sweet red pepper. You know, one that I got for just 25 cents at the market yesterday!

Focused on protein, I sliced up an Alfresco Sweet Apple Chicken sausage, which are currently BOGO at Publix until Wednesday:

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I added them to the pan with the seared red onions and quick cooked them until everything was browned and smelled intoxicating.

Seriously, it's a work of art!

Seriously, it’s a work of art!

 

One fried egg over top and a slice of toasted Rudi’s Original Bread and I was in LABOR DAY BREAKFAST HEAVEN!

Under 400 calories, all freshly prepared in under 10 minutes, and packed full of protein and flavor for a fun day off!

Bon appetit, my friends!

~ Tori

Easiest Eggplant Recipe EVER!

One of my favorite dishes in the WORLD is Eggplant Parmesan. Of course, that’s basically one of the least healthy preparation methods for vegetables you can think of.

My alternative to that is the following recipe, which tastes DELICIOUS, is super cheap (under $5), and super quick.

Ingredients:

  • Giant, fresh eggplant, sliced about 1 inch thick.
  • Extra virgin olive oil
  • Balsamic Vinegar
  • Garlic Powder
  • Dried Basil
  • Dried Oregano
  • Kraft Romano Parmesan Shaker
  • Sliced cherry, Roma, or beefsteak tomatoes (your preference.)
  • Breadcrumbs (optional)

As a VEGAN option, replace regular Parmesan with a soy or almond-milk alternative. There are several to choose from!

The night before, slice your eggplant and throw it into one of those giant (gallon) plastic bags. Add the olive oil (I use roughly 2 tbsp) and the balsamic vinegar (roughly 1 tbsp) to the bag. Target also makes an awesome mixture of the two which is only 90 calories per serving, great for those of us who find using two bottles of sauce too complicated.

Shake well to evenly coat the sliced eggplant, then add the garlic powder, basil, and oregano. Allow to marinate overnight.

Ignore the broccoli. I was prepping another meal simultaneously. I'm nothing if not a multi-tasker!

Ignore the broccoli. I was prepping another meal simultaneously. I’m nothing if not a multi-tasker!

The next day, preheat the oven to 425 degrees.

While it’s preheating, lay out the marinated eggplant on an un-greased cookie sheet. Cover each slice of eggplant with tomato (I prefer beefsteak, as they create a nice silhouette on the eggplant) and then shake some Parmesan over the top. If you like breadcrumbs, now is the time to add them, as well. In addition to this, I normally sprinkle on a little extra basil, salt, and pepper – totally optional.

Bake for about 15 minutes or until desired softness. If you’re feeling crazy, feel free to add some 2% mozzarella cheese (or Daiya, if you’re Paleo like me!) and broil at 500 degrees for an additional 3-5 minutes to melt the cheese.

I eat these as is but I serve them alongside marina sauce for my husband, who likes to dunk everything (including babies, I’m sure) into some sort of sauce.

Each slice of eggplant is roughly 65-75 calories if you DON’T add the extra cheese and breadcrumbs. With the additional items, each is probably increased to 90-100 calories. Which is totally worth it, considering two big slices fills me up and a third slice makes me STUFFED.

A great dinner or side dish and perfect for those on Paleo, vegetarian, or calorie-cutting diets! 🙂

Bon appetit, my friends!

~ Tori

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Farmer’s Markets – The Way to Go!

One of the most common things I hear from people hesitant to “reform” their eating habits is that it’s “too expensive” to eat more fresh fruits and veggies. A few years ago, I likely would have believed that. Anyone who goes into their local Publix to stock up on fresh staples knows that you can easily drop $50 on a week’s worth of fresh fruits and veggies – and that’s if you go for what’s on sale and/or in season.

Fortunately, most cities – big or small – feature a weekend Farmer’s Market which is the BEST place to go if you’re focus is to get healthy on a budget.

My grandmother stayed the weekend with me (she just turned 71 on 8/30 – wish that lady a Happy Birthday, would ya?!) and we made it a point to hit TWO Farmer’s Markets this morning.

The first market, featured at Lake Eola in Downtown Orlando, I picked up the following:

  • One GIANT eggplant: $2
  • Yellow squash (5): $2.50
  • Carton of fresh cut, organic watermelon: $4
  • Fresh mango, skinned and sliced: $4
  • GIANT sweet onion: $1 (see picture below)
  • Poblano peppers (2): $1
  • Organic apples (4): $3
  • Organic pears (2): $1.50
That is one of the biggest onions I've ever seen. It must weigh two pounds.

That is one of the biggest onions I’ve ever seen. It must weigh two pounds.

At the second market, at the beautiful Lake Lily in Maitland, I was thrilled to discover the prices were EVEN LOWER:

  • Sweet potatoes (2): $1.25
  • Bunches of green onion (4): $2
  • Mixed peppers (4): $1 (what a steal!)
  • Fresh, chopped broccoli: $1.25
  • Limes (4): $1
  • Kale: $1.50
  • Bunch of Chives: $1

Seriously, look at this haul:

I forgot to take a picture BEFORE I started prepping the veggies, so don't judge the plastic baggies in the back corner.

I forgot to take a picture BEFORE I started prepping the veggies, so don’t judge the plastic baggies in the back corner.

This is EASILY enough fruit and veggies to last me a week (minimum) and I spent less than $30 in total for everything. To be honest, the pre-cut watermelon and mango were splurge items, as the Lake Lily market had whole mangoes for just $0.75 each. The same goes for watermelon: I could have purchased a WHOLE watermelon for just $3, but I know how lazy I am when it comes to preparation, so the $8 I spent on those two items was more out of expected apathy than thrift.

For less than it costs for a meal out for two (no cocktails, no appetizer), I literally have enough fresh fruits and veggies to eat for two weeks on my own. As a reformed vegetarian, I could happily live on veggies myself for weeks, but my husband, a die-hard carnivore, begs for steak, chicken, or fish as an accompaniment. Still, factoring in a package of organic chicken at Publix (currently on sale), a bag of wild Alaskan salmon, and the BOGO on baby back ribs at Fresh Market, I will literally feed my husband and I for less than $60 this week and it’ll all be fresh, mostly organic, and HEALTHY.

So… what’s your excuse for NOT eating well again?

I’m pretty sure this is significantly cheaper than dining out 3x per week and picking up fast food the other days.

Bon appetit, my friends!

~ Tori

Up, Down, and In-Between

This week has been all over the map.

I feel like I’m on a roller coaster of weight, flipping upside down and defying gravity one moment only to have the G-force throw me back into the seat with a humbling thud in the next.

I’ve watched the scale go from 139.2 down to 133.2, then back up to 138 today, all in less than a week. I can only attribute it to water fluctuations, as I’ve been eating relatively normal (a little more than normal, but nothing substantial) and I’ve still hit the gym four times in the last five days.

I’m trying to not let it get to me and instead focus on the fact that I no longer fit into 75% of my wardrobe (good thing) and that I have to grab both a size 4 and a size 6 when I go into a dressing room, as I’m now somewhere in between the two sizes versus sitting solidly in the larger.

I would seriously ring this bell to have someone scratch my back. Sometimes those tags are REALLY itchy. Image Source: http://s3-media3.ak.yelpcdn.com/bphoto/KXY6lr0ez5WwPmPq8Me2Kw/l.jpg

I would seriously ring this bell to have someone scratch my back. Sometimes those tags are REALLY itchy.
Image Source: http://s3-media3.ak.yelpcdn.com/bphoto/KXY6lr0ez5WwPmPq8Me2Kw/l.jpg

I have some pretty MAJOR news coming up regarding my weight loss journey that I’m not quite ready to share, only because I fear jinxing it. I hope to announce it on here some time next week; I’m just waiting on confirmation of a few dates before I make it publicly known.

To give some hints:

  • No, I’m not pregnant.
  • No, I’m not having cosmetic surgery of any kind.
  • This relates to my WRITING just as much as it does to my weight loss.

I promise, I won’t keep the suspense going too long. I’m basically bursting at the seams, eager to tell everyone, but I know how quickly things get thrown off course and I certainly would hate to have to come back here to recant my words. As soon as I can safely announce the news, I’ll be back on here to tell the world!

Until then, my friends – BON APPETIT!

~ Tori

 

 

Games With My Head

OK, now my body (and the scale) is just playing games with me.

As you may have seen with yesterday’s post, my weight jumped up six pounds in six days, a feat of fat-lardiness that had never been experienced before. It was a glorious fatxplosion of self-hatred and jiggle when I hopped off of the scale in the morning and I carried that stress/anxiety/anger throughout most of the day.

Fatxplosion (n): Like a regular explosion, only meatier. Photo Credit: http://images.alphacoders.com/528/52831.jpg

Fatxplosion (n):

Like a regular explosion, only meatier.

Photo Credit: http://images.alphacoders.com/528/52831.jpg

Understandably, I was freaking the *bleep* out yesterday.

I ate relatively well (except for a small bowl of coconut ice cream post-gym) yesterday and expected to see nominal difference on the scale today, because that’s just how my life normally works as a yo-yo dieter.

Consumed: 1,453 (damn ice cream) Burned: 999 (couldn't round up, could it?)

Consumed: 1,453 (damn ice cream)
Burned: 999 (couldn’t round up, could it?)

This morning, I was 135.6.

Granted, it’s not the beautiful 133.8 I was last Monday, but it’s down four pounds overnight (did the pudge-fairy visit last night?) and I felt somewhat better compared to yesterday. At least last week’s week-long diet faux-pas hadn’t truly destroyed all of the my success from the month.

So that’s something.

I am getting a bit annoyed with the head-games the scale (my weight) has been playing with me lately. The ups, the downs. It’s enough to drive a girl insane! I think I may try to avoid weighing myself again until Friday so I can actually see true change versus the “tide” movements of my water weight.

Until then, bon appetit, my friends!

~ Tori

Physically Impossible? Not for me.

So, the trend of good Mondays has come to an end.

After nearly four weeks of intensive work at the gym and eating right, I managed to completely ruin/sabotage my success in just a few days.

CONGRATS TO ME!

You think I’m exaggerating, but let’s compare last Tuesday (8/20/2013) to this Monday (8/26/2013).

Last Tuesday, the scale read: 133.8.

I was so happy, I even took a picture of it:

Ah, sweet memories.

Ah, sweet memories.

It was a momentous occasion. I was officially lower than I had been since 5th grade.

This morning, the scale read 139.2.

The difference?

I still hit the gym five days last week. Each time, I burned no less than 400 calories, most days over 1,000 calories.

The only difference was that I cut myself slack on a few days with my diet. I let myself splurge and now I’m paying the consequences. I gave myself an inch and my f*cking weight took the whole damn mile.

Here’s the breakdown of my calories last week, care of MyFitnessPal.com. Let me know when you spot the downward trend:

Monday 8/19/2013:

Consumed: 1,227. Burned: 1,130

Consumed: 1,227.
Burned: 1,130

Tuesday 8/20/2013:

Consumed: 2,085 (bad!) Burned: 1,050 (at least it cancelled out)

Consumed: 2,085 (bad!)
Burned: 1,050 (at least it cancelled out)

Wednesday 8/21/2013:

Consumed: 1,822 Burned: 423 (Starting to notice a trend here? Yeaaah.)

Consumed: 1,822
Burned: 423
(Starting to notice a trend here? Yeaaah.)

Thursday 8/22/2013:

Consumed: 1,271 Burned: 1,051 (Am I back on the straight and narrow?! Redemption!)

Consumed: 1,271
Burned: 1,051
(Am I back on the straight and narrow?! Redemption!)

Friday 8/23/2013:

Consumed: 2,380 Burned: 851 (It's Friday. My only cheat day, I promise.... right?)

Consumed: 2,380
Burned: 851
(It’s Friday. My only cheat day, I promise…. right?)

Saturday 8/24/2013:

Consumed: 3,710 Burned: 67 (Oh, for fuck's sake. I literally consumed a pound of excess calories today.)

Consumed: 3,710
Burned: 67
(Oh, for fuck’s sake. I literally consumed a pound of excess calories today.)

Sunday 8/25/2013:

Consumed: 1,907 Burned: 91 (Might as well enjoy the morbid obesity.)

Consumed: 1,907
Burned: 91
(Might as well enjoy the morbid obesity.)

 

Yes, I was very bad last week. But, in doing the math, assuming I need 1,500 calories daily to MAINTAIN my weight and anything over that (that I don’t burn off) results in weight gain, how did I GAIN SIX POUNDS?!?!

Mathematically, it doesn’t make sense.

I consumed a total of 14,397 calories last week. (That just SOUNDS horrific).

Assuming 1,500 to live (and not factoring in my exercise) I should have not consumed more than 10,500. That puts me at a surplus of 3,897 calories – roughly a 1.5 pound weight gain if I round up.

However, adding in my burned calories, which was roughly 4,663 in total cardiovascular/strength exercises (not counting the normal day-to-day living stuff), I should STILL BE AT A DEFICIT for the week.

I should be at: -766 calories for the week net. I should have stayed around the same weight or even have lost an ounce or two.

BUT NO.

No, not my body. I’m up SIX GOD DAMN POUNDS.

I could punch something. I’m debating punching myself.

People often tease me for how regimented I am. For the fact that I count every calorie and obsess over what I put in my mouth. Do you SEE now why I have to do this?! Is this not proof? I allowed myself to eat whatever I wanted for 50% of last week – and still hit the gym hard five days in a row – and I’m up the weight of a god damn baby!

Is there a food baby in my lower intestine or something?! A beautiful, rosy-cheeked six pound LARD BABY rolling around in my duodenum?

UGHHHHHHH.

So angry. So frustrated. So ready to kick this week’s ass.

You thought I was hardcore before… watch me.

~ Tori

 

 

 

My New Obsession: Rudi’s Original Gluten-Free Bread

Despite staying under 1,300 calories per day and working out 5-6 days per week, my weight has creeped up a tiny bit this week. I’m back up to 135.8 as of this morning.

I’m not freaking out, though, as there are a lot of factors contributing to it:

  • I’ve doubled up on strength workouts. And we all know that muscle weighs more than fat. Cheeky bastard, that muscle tissue.
  • Don’t want to get into TMI-territory, but I’m at the special time in a lady’s cycle that causes her to eat chocolate, cry unnecessarily, and gain a lot of water weight. And punch people. Yeaaaaah, punch people.
  • I’ve discovered the most delicious “cheat food” in the world: Rudi’s Original Gluten Free Bread!
Can I pull a Lady Gaga and make a dress out of this? I want to just roll around in a massive pile of this bread and eat my way out of it.

Can I pull a Lady Gaga and make a dress out of this? I want to just roll around in a massive pile of this bread and eat my way out of it.

Seriously, this sh*t is crack to me.

Last week, as I perused the aisles of Publix, bored and hungry, I happened to spot a beloved BOGO sale in the frozen section for the bread. Normally, I try to stick with my Paleo-approved coconut bread from Julian’s Bakery, but at $6.99 per loaf and $15 shipping (not to mention a six loaf minimum order!), I haven’t been able to restock lately. Not that I don’t like $12 turkey sandwiches packed into my lunch-pal and all, but for $4.99 for TWO LOAVES of this Rudi’s Original Gluten-Free (plus dairy and soy free!) bread, I decided to try it out (and excuse the fact that it included the forbidden rice flour) this one time.

Best decision ever.

Skeptical as I was, I decided to have my first slice of this bread on Monday night as I ate my leftover pasta (miracle noodle) dish from the weekend. I toasted a single slice (90 calories, 17g carbs) in the toaster over and used it to lap up the remaining tomato sauce.

HOLY CRAP.

This bread has a fluffy, wonderful Wonder-bread (sinful!) texture and the flavor of the ever-fattening picnic staple: POTATO bread. It melts on your tongue with a very buttery flavor – which explains the 90 calories per slice – and I could barely stop myself from wolfing the slice down in three bites.

Rudi’s, you’ve outdone yourself here. This is the BEST gluten-free product I’ve had so far. It perfectly replaces the texture and flavor of even the richest glutinous bread and I feel no depravity using this for a sandwich over any other freshly-baked option out there.

Needless to say, I sent my husband out to buy SIX MORE LOAVES (come on, they’re BOGO – I’m not being obsessive) to stock up my freezer and I’ve been eating 1-2 slices daily this whole week. Considering I’m normally VERY low on my sugars, this could be a contributing factor to my two pound weight gain so far this week.

You know what?

The bread is damn worth it.

Even though the BOGO sale at Publix is over, I did find a $1.00 off coupon for it (you’re welcome!) in case any of my readers now feel compelled to test it out. I promise, you won’t be sorry. DELICIOUS!

Bon appetit, my friends!

~ Tori